February 22, 2010

How do you figure out what it is that you really want? 23

So many peo­ple have no idea what they want or just haven’t taken the time to seri­ously think about it. They aim for noth­ing and hit it with amaz­ing accuracy.

The first and very impor­tant step to achiev­ing all your goals is actu­ally hav­ing a clear pic­ture of what they are.

Once you are clear you can start to take action in the direc­tion of your goals and fash­ion a plan that will get you there.

So let me ask you…

  • Are you some­one who just can’t decide from the mil­lions of choices avail­able to you?
  • Have you sat down to write out your goals but just draw a blank?
  • Are you some­one who sets and achieves goals in one area of your life but falls short in others?
  • Are you some­one who has no idea where to start?

Well let me share with you some hints to make this process quick, easy and rel­a­tively painless…

1. Divide your goals into 5 com­mon key areas in your life:

  • Money and mate­r­ial possessions,
  • Rela­tion­ships and Partners,
  • Health and Weight Loss,
  • Career and Business
  • Per­sonal Devel­op­ment and Spirituality.

2. Draw 3 columns on a sheet of paper and title the columns as…

What I Don’t Want, What I Do Want, Why I Want It.

* When fill­ing in the “What I Don’t Want” col­umn ask your­self “What don’t I want based on past experiences?”

Some­times it is eas­ier to iden­tify the qual­i­ties you don’t want in a sit­u­a­tion because they have been your focus. This is espe­cially true if you have just left a job, busi­ness or rela­tion­ship. Write these things in col­umn 1 then write the oppo­site, pos­i­tive state­ment of this in col­umn 2.

For exam­ple:

  • I don’t want to be broke – I have an abun­dance of money
  • I don’t want a job I hate – I love my job
  • I don’t want to be alone — I am in a lov­ing relationship
  • I don’t want to be fat — I am trim, taut and terrific

* When fill­ing in the “What I Do Want” col­umn ask your­self “If I had $10 mil­lion and I knew I couldn’t fail, what would I do, be and have?”

This col­umn con­tains the oppo­site state­ments from col­umn 1 and your dreams and desires.

For exam­ple:

  • I have $1 mil­lion in the bank.
  • I am the num­ber 1 sales­man in my industry.
  • I cheer­fully exer­cise every day.
  • I have a full­time housekeeper.
  • I donate 10% of my income to wor­thy charities.

* When fill­ing in the “Why I Want It” col­umn ask your­self “Once I achieve this goal, who will ben­e­fit? How will that make me feel?”

Here is where you focus on your moti­va­tion to achieve these things. Focus­ing on your WHY gives cre­ates a “vol­cano” of burn­ing, inter­nal moti­va­tion espe­cially if your WHY is some­thing out­side of your­self, greater than just you alone.

For exam­ple:

  • My part­ner falls in love with me all over again.
  • I make my par­ents proud.
  • I have the love and respect of my children.
  • I attract my per­fect partner.
  • I have the free­dom of choice.

3. Next step is to arrange col­umn 2 and 3 into a list of short, pow­er­ful, present tense statements.

When you read and recite this list each day you want to achieve the feel­ing that these things exist NOW (which they do) and it’s just a mat­ter of time before they mate­ri­al­ize in your life.

For exam­ple:

  • I drive a Mer­cedes 500SL
  • I earn $20,000 per month
  • I am gen­er­ous with fam­ily & friends
  • I am in a joy­ous, lov­ing relationship

Con­grat­u­la­tions! You now have a clear and con­cise list of exactly what you want to achieve. This puts you ahead of the major­ity of the population.

Believe me, this is a very excit­ing and empow­er­ing accomplishment.

Now don’t worry, actu­ally you can expect this…you may find your­self want­ing to make changes to this list espe­cially once you visu­al­ize these things exist­ing now.

Noth­ing here is set in stone and you will find your­self mak­ing fre­quent changes to this list, espe­cially once you start to tick things off!

Being clear about what you want and com­mit­ting this list to paper is Step 1 in a 4 Step suc­cess process…this is all that stands between you and the con­trol over the hap­pi­ness and pos­i­tive out­comes in your life.

My friend Natalie Led­well from the Mind Movies Team details all 4 Steps for you in an awe­some video she just sent me…

Here is the link:

http://www.mindmovies.com/nataliesgift/?12594

You won’t believe how sim­ple and easy to imple­ment these 4 Steps are. It doesn’t cost any­thing and will start play­ing auto­mat­i­cally for you once you click on the link.

Enjoy!

Published on February 22, 2010. Enjoyed this post? Share it on Facebook, StumbleUpon, Delicious, Digg or Reddit. Thanks!

23 Comments on “How do you figure out what it is that you really want?” - Post your own?

Personal Development and Success Blog says 6 months ago

We STOP dream­ing because at some point in our life we were told the dream we had was unre­al­is­tic. And after hear­ing it enough times from oth­ers we started believ­ing it too. A dream that once felt so good to think about and seemed so pos­si­ble to achieve, sud­denly left us feel­ing silly for ever hav­ing it. So we did the only thing we could do, we packed our dream(s) safely away, not to be shared again.

Great post yet again Brian!

How do you figure out what it is that you really want? « My Inner Thoughts says 6 months, 1 week ago

[…] today onto this guy’s blog. He’s called Brian Wong (not the TCS host btw) and an entry on his blog. It was writ­ten very sim­ply for lay­man to just jump-start the dream­ing process that we […]

Kagondu says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

HI Brian,

If only I can “like” it like I could have on Face­book. Please con­sider shar­ing as a note on FB — thanks. I’m with you on FB, so think that shar­ing with peo­ple I know who can ben­e­fit would be a great plus. Again, this I like.

ken at FreeTGRbook.com says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

I write down my goals then another one comes along so I have so many but then change my plans because new things come into my life.

Scottie says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

These are really great/helpful tips Brian! I like how orga­nized and con­cise these steps are and how effec­tive they appear to be. It’s funny how the same infor­ma­tion and advice is passed around and shared yet we still for­get or slack on the very things that will cre­ate the results that we want.

Once again my friend, thanks and keep rockin’ it!

Scot­tie

Alejandro Estevez says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Brian: I actu­ally have this “game” with my fam­ily, a few months ago we started, at din­ner time, to ask ques­tions such as: if money was not an issue would you really keep the job you have? or: If time or money where not an issue, would you travel, where, for how long? would you hike the dessert or would you still climb such vol­cano? and some crazy questions.

Some­how all the answers have cre­ated a roadmap for my fol­low­ing years, it has come to my life as a blue­print of my fol­low­ing steps. Now that you have pub­lished a sim­i­lar aproach, it makes so much more sense. I hope that these three columns can be turned into fam­ily con­ver­sa­tion for every­body, its a lit­tle hard at the begin­ning but once you get the hang of it it allows to build per­sonal goals and to plan with spe­cific dates, paths and espe­cially with what we really love.

andy bax says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Hi Brian this is great stuff..Yes you have to set clear goals to be able to find a way to achieve this, and then you’re attract ways to get — dreams– wealth –abundance

Rajyalakshmi says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Yes, the four steps are really need­ful and excel­lent. To achieve any thing we need to plan and visu­al­ize end result repeat­edly. Thanks, Mr.Brian for the valyable info shared.
Thanks again!

phantom poet says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Illu­sion

It’s all an illu­sion
we come to find out
we cre­ate our own real­i­ties
it’s all a mat­ter of choice
but there can’t be any doubt
in our pro­jected iden­ti­ties
it will all boil down
to an idea of what is real
then how you acted upon it
or how it made you feel
then build­ing on a good feel­ing
toward your ulti­mate dream
we co-create what it is we get
no mat­ter what we choose to for­get.
A rela­tion to the expe­ri­ence
and what we believe
will ulti­mately dic­tate
what it is we receive.

brian says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Thanks for all the pos­i­tive com­ments. For those who find it dif­fi­cult to avoid neg­a­tiv­ity here’s my advice…

The goal is not to get rid of neg­a­tiv­ity because its not pos­si­ble. If you study the nat­ural laws, there is a law of polar­ity. e.g. Good & bad, up & down, high & low. So there will ALWAYS be two sides to every coin. Don’t fight it.

Embrace the fact that some­times, you will feel neg­a­tive, some­times, you will feel down but KNOW that you don’t have to live there! We all expe­ri­ence both ups and downs. No excep­tions. The answer lies in where you CHOOSE to place your focus.

Once you rec­og­nize that you have the power to choose where you focus your atten­tion, accept the fact that there will be neg­a­tive peo­ple, places and events.

Ask your­self, “what is the good in this expe­ri­ence?”. Your answer will change your experience.

Where you choose to place your focus — that becomes your reality.

mona says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

hi Mr.Wong .. yhank you very much for ur tips but am hav­ing aprob­lem in focus­ing in the pos­i­tive think­ing on my thoughts .. am sur­rounded by a neg­a­tive think­ing fam­ily would u help me please??

Michelle says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

This is a fan­tas­tic addi­tion to Natalie’s 4 Steps. Thank you very much for putting this together. It’s greatly appreciated!

Bret Glass says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

I am cer­tain through per­sonal expe­ri­ence, through post-manifestational aware­ness, through watch­ing the point of focus and rep­e­ti­tion yield that which dom­i­nates our consciousness…that what you have shared has great res­o­nance with me. I am cur­rently wak­ing every day to my vibra­tionally cre­ated life feel­ing the emo­tions, car­ry­ing myself in a man­ner rep­re­sen­ta­tive of that emo­tion, speak­ing about what I have cre­ated on a reg­u­lar basis…there is great power in delib­er­ate cre­ation and I feel the abun­dance of it all.

I am appre­cia­tive of what you have felt inspired to share and look for­ward to the daily reminders.

Wish­ing you that which you wish for yourself.

MC B (Mas­ter Cre­ator Bret)

julie evans says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

i haveread and reread,but i still wish i could loose the low ittle voice of doubt, please tell me how, and how to stop think­ing “wht if,what if”

y whole life ‚needs chang­ing just dont know where to start

thanks for all the help

julie

Goals Coaching says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Well put Brian! Clear, con­cise and work­able. Thanks for post­ing.
Lynn Moore

Gergina Petkova says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Thank you,Brian:)I think that it is very well writ­ten & gives many clear answers:)

Rebecca says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

I have enjoyed read­ing the infor­ma­tion on what do you fig­ure out what you don’t want by Brian. Infor­ma­tion is prac­ti­cal and true because when a per­son truly fails to plan it means he or she is plannning to fail in life hence we must be very care­ful about our plans for suc­cess. read­ing this type of infor­ma­tion helps a per­son with regards to man­ag­ing one’s life fruitfully

Frank says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

fantab­u­lous You cin­tributed to me thnak you love you

Maureen Mahoney says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Thanks Brian. Excel­lent infor­ma­tion.
Very often what blocks peo­ple from get­ting what they really want in life is CHARGE. That is, emo­tional charge. It’s the key item that stops peo­ple in life, even if they are mov­ing towards some­thing that they really want.
PROCESSING and CLEARING the charge will allow the per­son to eas­ily get and main­tain what they truly desire.
Warm regards,
Maureen

Alberto says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Hello Brian,

I was intrigued by the tag line “4 steps to hap­pi­ness” because I believe it only takes 3 steps. Then I real­ized that you were actu­ally giv­ing detailed instruc­tions to reach hap­pi­ness. I like that. It’s sim­ple and achiev­able with very lit­tle effort. The key, I guess, is to cre­ate the habit, to make a con­scious deci­sion to take con­trol of what turns up in my life.

You have spurred me into tak­ing some action and I am grate­ful for that.

Cre­ate a great day Brian. some­whow I know you will.

Alberto

Greg Irwin says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Thanks Brian,
I needed that. I live in Tokyo, Japan. They say here when the US catches a cold, Japan sneezes. That is the way it has been with the econ­omy as well. So many peo­ple in Japan are very neg­a­tive since the money stopped flow­ing so eas­ily so I have to work hard dou­ble time to stay pos­i­tive and not let it affect me and my busi­ness but we are human and it is not always easy. I like your posts and will try to learn and grow with you. Thank you!
Greg Irwin

theresa8@bellsouth.net says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

thank you this was the shot in my arm i needed .

Hubert says 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Thanks Brian for shar­ing this,
I like the fact that you said when you said when you aim for noth­ing you hit it with accuracy,if we don’t plan any­thing for our­selves we will get noth­ing in the end. Clear vision helps us know exactly how to make it works.
Thanks again!!

Post a Comment

required field indicator denotes compulsory fields. Off-topic or inappropriate comments will be edited or deleted. Your email address will never be published.